This quote comes from the inestimable Janet Reid (if you are unfamiliar with Janet Reid, you are probably either new to the world of writing...or you have slacked off on your accumulation of knowledge as a writer), and while I was pondering the sorts of things I ponder, this quote popped up in my mind.
Lately, I have been having a difficult time writing new stuff. By "lately," I really mean "for the last two and a half years."
Jordan, aren't you only 25 years old?
Yes.
Isn't two and a half years, like, 10% of your life?
Yes.
Of course, not the entire two and a half years have been bleary, but enough of it has been that it stands out in my thinking as a dark time for my creative advancement. A lot of started-and-stopped manuscripts. A lot of failed projects. A lot of stuff that seemed explosively promising while I was working on it, only for me to realize that it wasn't explosively promising...only for me to come back to the project six months later and realize it was explosively promising...only for me to pick it up again and, in time, train-wreck it. Yeah. Stuff like that.
And this is what I realized: I finished the first draft of The Great Lenore two and a half years ago, I knew I had something really special with that manuscript, and I began to put too much pressure on myself.
Of course, since that time, The Great Lenore has had its own ups and downs - it landed with a top-notch agent; it received "praise-but-we'd-like-to-see-some-changes" from editors at such publishing houses as HarperCollins and St. Martin's Press; it lost its agent; it received a record-breaking 28 requests from agents in its second go-around; it even got the ol' "I think you're a terrific writer, but this novel just didn't resonate with me...I'll be glad to hear from you on future novels. I'm so sorry to pass." from Janet Reid; and it is currently still floating around out there with a number of people - but as for new projects, everything has been mostly downs.
And it all boils down to one solid mistake: Thinking too hard about "what sells?" and about "what is commercially viable?" and not thinking enough about "what drives me?"
What Drives Me?
This is the question that we should be asking ourselves as writers.
If you write something that drives you, it will drive someone else.
If you write something that you can write passionately, there will be readers who feel passionately about it.
If you love what you're writing, someone will want to read it...and they will want to tell others about it.
This is where I make the change. This is where I go back to writing what drives me.
How about you? Are you there already? If you are - congratulations! That's awesome; just remember to keep it that way.
If you're not there already, think about it. Perhaps this can be where you make the change as well.
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